Colorful Queer Diy Handfasting & Potluck Wedding Celebration

The blog post features stunning photographs by Laura Böök, showcasing the unique partnership of Nino and Maiju. The special occasion took place at Pohjolan Pirtti in Lammassaari, Helsinki, Finland on August 21st, 2021. The picturesque setting and memorable moments are captured beautifully through Laura’s lens, providing a glimpse into this unforgettable day.

Our colorful queer DIY handfasting &potluck wedding celebration at a glance:

We opted for an unconventional wedding setup, with an outdoor ceremony that wasn’t your typical religious or civil service. Since we had already obtained our legal marriage certificate from the magistrate’s office prior to the big day, we decided to hire a friend who is both a singer and actor to perform a personalized ceremony in front of our loved ones.

The script was carefully crafted based on various handfasting ceremonies found online, allowing us to put our own spin on the traditional vows. In Finland, it’s not customary for couples to write their own wedding vows, but we wanted to add an extra layer of emotional depth to the proceedings – so we ended up saying ‘I do’ three times! To make things even more special, we asked our guests to participate by bringing a dish to share as part of a potluck-style reception.

I provided the recipes and a friend helped organize the logistics, ensuring that everyone had something delicious to enjoy. The entire wedding was a DIY affair, with plenty of friends lending a hand to help us bring our vision to life.

Maiju, who is a skilled scenographer and theatre production designer, took charge of creating the perfect atmosphere and decorations – including fairy lights, party flags used in a recent stage design project, and natural elements like rowan branches, rosehips, and acorns that we foraged ourselves. We encouraged our guests to dress comfortably yet festively, reflecting our own relaxed and joyful approach to celebrating our love.

As an LGBTQ+-friendly couple, we wanted our wedding to be inclusive and welcoming, and ‘comfortable and festive’ seemed like the perfect way to strike a balance between elegance and ease.

Tell us about the handfasting ceremony:

As the ceremony began, a friend took the stage to perform an opening song, ‘Greensleeves’ with Finnish lyrics. The atmosphere was set, and we made our way down the path, hands held, as a symbol of unity. Our handfasting ceremony was a beautiful blend of tradition and personal touch.

We exchanged vows, with three key questions guiding our promises to one another: what kind of love will you show each other, how will you support each other’s dreams, and how will you grow together through life’s ups and downs? The friend who performed the ceremony asked us these questions, and we responded with heartfelt ‘I am’s’ and ‘I do’s. As we sealed our union with a knot in the handfasting cord, we knew that our love would prevail, no matter what life brings.

After exchanging our vows, we shared a tender kiss, surrounded by confetti made from dried flowers and leaves. With the ceremony complete, we welcomed our loved ones into the venue, basking in their congratulations and well-wishes as we began our new life together.

Tell us about the potluck wedding reception:

We opted for a more low-key celebration, eschewing party games and sexist traditions altogether. Instead, we gathered inside to cut the cake, inviting everyone to socialize, eat, and drink. The evening was punctuated by heartfelt speeches and impromptu performances from friends who showcased their singing talents. To commemorate the occasion, we had a guest book, an Instax camera, and paper slips where attendees were encouraged to jot down their aspirations for future collaborations with us.

What was the most important lesson you learned from your wedding?

Before embarking on a DIY project, it’s crucial to have a solid plan in place. Our experience with making our own clothing for the wedding was a perfect example of this. I’m typically someone who likes to start projects the night before they’re due to begin, but the wedding preparations taught me the importance of project management and scheduling. In fact, we started working on some of the items over a year in advance, which helped us avoid last-minute stress.

When it comes to budgeting for a DIY endeavor, it’s essential to be realistic and consider all the potential expenses that might arise. Our original budget was approximately 2000 EUR, but as you can imagine, this was far from sufficient. My parents kindly covered the cost of the venue, but we still ended up spending around 4000 EUR in total. It’s amazing how quickly small expenses can add up, and there’s always something that slips your mind.

A well-planned approach and a realistic budget are key to avoiding financial stress and ensuring that your DIY project turns out as expected.